Tanner's Birth Story

Tanner is two weeks old, so I wanted to take the time to write this out before the details start to get foggy. So far (after Tanner’s grand entrance that I’m about to tell you about) everything about being a second time mom has been 100x easier than being a first time mom. I’m not sure if that’s because he’s a great baby or I’m just calmer and more relaxed, feeling confident in my abilities? But either way we are all so happy over here in our newborn bubble! 

I should have known my delivery would be completely different than it was with Tatum because my whole pregnancy was. I wish I had gotten one last pregnant photo before Tanner made his arrival, but as you’ll soon read, there just wasn’t any time or thought for that! Tatum arrived four days past her due date after 13 hours of labor (2.5 hours of that was actively pushing I should add), so I didn’t really count on Tanner coming early. However, on the morning of Friday, August 2, I had a doctor’s appointment. They checked me and I was dilated to 3 cm, but I hadn’t had any signs of labor yet. I left and Tatum and I went to the park, walked around Target for an hour, and then I proceeded to clean my entire house, all our sheets and bedding, and organized the rest of the baby stuff that was lying around. My mom says this was her first clue I was going to have the baby soon.

We got some good news about the sale of our Utah house that morning, and my parents were due to arrive on Sunday. Basically in my mind, I was so relieved from that, Brian had made it another full week of work without me going into labor, and now I felt I could have baby at any time and the timing would work out perfectly. (We didn’t want Brian taking time off for paternity leave before my parents got here because he and my stepdad were going to work on the house addition while he was off HAHA). 

When Brian got home from work that night, we had dinner, he played with Tatum, and we got her into bed at 8 like usual. I decided I was going to go take a bath while Brian submitted some school assignments. I got out of the bath around 8:30, laid down in bed and talked to Brian while he was working, and around 8:45 I felt my first contraction. Because my mom and stepdad hadn’t arrived yet, my cousin Joe and his wife Julie had graciously offered to take Tatum if I went into labor, so I texted Julie around 9:15 and said, “Starting to have some contractions, I'm going to keep track over the next little bit and see where we're at! They just started randomly about an hour ago so we'll see if anything comes of it and I'll keep you posted!” Little did I know...

Less than 20 mins later, I was having such bad contractions I couldn’t even text, so Brian sent her this “Hey guys this Brian, her contractions are getting closer together.  I think we may have to take her to the hospital soon.  Would it be ok if we drop Tatum off?” 

It’s funny to read this now, knowing if he had taken Tatum to their house instead of Julie immediately getting in her car and coming to our house like she did since Tatum was already asleep, I wouldn’t have made it to the hospital. I quickly sobbed and kissed Tatum’s head before ducking out to breathe through another contraction. At 9:57, I called my mom and tried telling her what was happening between contractions while Brian told her we were headed to the hospital. At 10:19, I was checked in at the L&D desk, at 10:50, Tanner was born. 

To fill in some extra details... When we got to the hospital, Brian just parked the car at the curb because valet was closed. From sitting down in the wheelchair just inside the hospital door until we rode the elevator to the fifth floor, I had three contractions. They were coming every 30 seconds and I was dying. I remember praying that I was at least 5 cm dilated because that’s what I had to be before they gave me an epidural with Tatum and I NEEDED that epidural NOW. When we got to the desk, they immediately took me back to a room and it took me a good minute to even get into bed. They checked me and I was already at a 7 and progressing FAST. 

At this point, Brian actually thought it was important to go move the car SO IT DIDNT GET TOWED. I remember trying to be brave and tell him to go ahead, even though every part of me wanted him to stay. I could barely think and was trying to ask him to stay before finally just telling him to go ahead. In the 5 mins he was gone, I was left alone in the room and suffered through three contractions on my own where I literally thought “I’m going to die here all alone.” 

The nurses came back after what felt like an eternity and asked if I had wanted an epidural. When I responded with “yes. Now please.” They informed me “I don’t think you’ll make it, we have to draw blood and hook up your IV,...” etc. etc. and I yelled back “No don’t say that to me!” Apparently I’m very dramatic when I’m in pain.

When Brian got back, I was literally yelling that baby was coming, the nurses said I was at a 9, and the doctor had just walked in. She barely had her gloves on when I could feel my whole body pushing and there was nothing I could do to stop it. To be honest, I was terrified. Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a control freak. I don’t like to feel helpless or out of control, and that’s exactly what natural birth is. I didn’t prepare myself or learn breathing techniques or any of that natural birth Jazz because that just wasn’t my plan. I had such a positive experience with my epidural and Tatum’s birth that I wrongly assumed I would be lucky and have the same experience. 

The worst part was the pressure and the uncontrollable urge to push that my body was responding to. At some point, my rationale told me to just push with the contractions and get it over with so the pain would stop and I could hold my baby. I definitely remember sobbing and yelling and having no control over the volume of my voice. I probably pushed less than two minutes total and when I finally screamed that I couldn’t do this anymore, everyone informed me that his head was already out and I was almost done. Another push and he was here. It felt like an eternity, yet somehow only 31 minutes passed from when we got to the hospital to when he arrived.

It was the most intense and surreal moment of my entire life. After it was over, my whole body was shaking so bad that I could barely hold him. The adrenaline was so intense and I couldn’t hold my legs still at all. My entire labor was shorter with Tanner than the amount of time I spent pushing alone with Tatum. Time seemed to stand still while I held him for the first time and Brian and I just kept marveling and looking at each other saying I did it, I had him naturally, we can’t believe it, we can’t believe he’s here so fast. We took forever to name him but Tanner Jordan just felt right, and had been what we were leaning toward my entire pregnancy. 

I’m still so emotional looking at him because I’m so in love with him. I felt this instant connection to him and his peaceful little spirit calms me daily. He is the sweetest boy, so calm and mellow. He’s so snuggly and squishy and Tatum loves him so much, which has completely vanished all the mom guilt I had before he was born (thank gosh, because I was a WRECK). She’s always asking to hold him and kisses his head and holds his hand. She gets so worried when he cries and tries to share her toys and blankets with him. Basically we are all completely obsessed with him! 

He was 7 lbs 9 oz and 21 inches long. He loves to eat and has already started sleeping 6 hour stretches at night as of five days ago! He is the perfect addition to our family and it’s already hard to imagine life without him here! We love you so much, baby boy! 

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Tatum Jane: 3 Months

I'm about to sound like every new mom on the planet, but time really does fly way too fast when you have a little baby! Tatum is already over 3 months old and I'm just getting around to writing this. Our sweet little girl hash the most fun personality and she is already so alert and smart! 

A few fun things happened during her third month, mainly my first Mother's Day! Last year she was just a dream we were trying to make happen and now she's here and as fun as ever. Tatum has started wearing her first ponytails!!! Well, I guess it's actually a pig tail and it's so funny to see it on top of her head. She's like a little brunette Pebbles from the Flintstones. 

We took her on her first hike near Rainbow Gardens in Ogden, Utah and she got to play with her cousin Zoey a bit. I am going to miss being near Randy and Sabra and the baby so much. Hanging out with Sabra and Zoey and getting to be moms together for the first time was the greatest! They are already making plans to come see us in Florida and I am so excited! 

This month, Tatum has really started to suck on her hands and drool, A LOT. More than one person has told me they think she will be an early teether and I'm not sure how I feel about that! When we were in California she started doing a new trick: we would lean her back against some pillows so she was at about a 45 degree angle and she would sit right up! She doesn't use her hands or arms to help pull her up, she just sits up from the waist up using her abs! 

She loves when people let her stand and her legs are getting so strong. She also loves to babble and coo constantly and I swear sometimes it sounds like she's responding to us haha. She's started to really play with toys and loves things that rattle or jingle. We love having this beautiful baby girl in our family and she is so much fun!

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The Beginning of Baby Baldwin

Well, if you're reading this, I guess we finally spilled the beans! It feels like I've already been pregnant forever but unable to tell anyone about it. But I guess it's only been a little over 3 months. Still, it's crazy to think its been that long!

With all the craziness that is our everyday lives, Brian and I thought a lot (& prayed a LOT!) about when would be the best time for us to begin our little family. We've both switched jobs in the last 3 months, we've been crazy busy with church and just every day life, and now we have even bigger changes heading our way. Brian has been looking into Master's programs for after he graduates this upcoming April, and with that comes a lot of planning. We knew we didn't want to worry about potentially moving for grad school while I was pregnant and I didn't want to worry about missing his graduation if the baby was too little or not here, so we decided the beginning of 2017 would be a good time, and that's how Baby Baldwin's due date is February 18, 2017!

I jotted down notes as soon as I started feeling different, because weeks 1-6 were highly uneventful. We found out for sure I was pregnant at 4 weeks because I was impatient, and we were going camping in Moab and I decided I had to know before that. The test came back positive and the following Monday I went to the doctor to verify and the blood tests came back positive!

Week 7: baby is the size of a blueberry!

TERRIBLE nausea started hitting after getting stomach flu. The Friday before the 4th of July, I was at work and suddenly was running for the bathroom and threw up everything I had consumed in the last 10 hours. I thought morning sickness was already starting but it turns out there was a stomach flu circling around the office and I was the 4th person to come down with it. However, as soon as I was starting to feel better, the flu set off the true morning sickness. From then on, I was constantly nauseous, but not throwing up too much... until week 8. I was craving juicy fruits like watermelon, strawberries, and peaches, probably because I was ALWAYS thirsty. This also marked the start of being SO TIRED. Prior to week 7, I had no problem keeping food down or any food aversions. Just really sleepy a lot. Started retaining water and feeling a bit heavier but hadn't gained any weight. Skin got burnt a lot easier, especially starting week 4 when we were in Moab. We went on some really long hikes to the far away arches when we were down in Arches National Park and when we got back to the car, my fingers and ankles were so swollen I couldn't close my hands and I could tell I was somewhere between retaining water and being seriously dehydrated. It was my first wake up call that I would need to start drinking about double as much water now that I was pregnant.

Week 8: baby is the size of a raspberry!

This week was so surreal. I finally got a presciption to help with the nausea when we went for our first baby appointment. I was holding my breath, half expecting the doctor to start the ultrasound and tell me I wasn't pregnant because it didn't feel real. But there was baby, looking very similar to a gummy bear. I couldn't believe it but we were already able to hear the strong & crazy fast heart beat! Other weird things about this week was that I was hardcore craving Mexican food, but I was still throwing up a ton so I don't know why I thought Mexican sounded good... I pulled muscle in my back throwing up on the morning of my first appointment so that was a joy. I was hobbling around in serious pain for about 4 days before it started to subside. I was veryyyy tired all the time. Still always thirsty, but not dehydrated according to the doctor. We made a decision to cancel the Bahama's cruise we had booked back in March due to the spreading Zika virus. Although it hasn't been reported there yet, it's in Haiti, Cuba, the Dominican Republic and basically every other island around it. Luckily I bought the insurance and we got a full refund for cancelling far enough in advance.

Week 9: Baby is the size of a green olive! 

I guess I really am my mother's daughter because even after getting the prescription from the doctor for nausea, I was hesitant and tried everything I could to avoid taking it. Alas, all the ginger in the world in every form couldn't help my sensitive stomach and I finally caved when I realized I was only able to eat and keep things down with the medicine. The new trend was throwing up in the mornings when I was brushing my teeth. I apparently have the most sensitive gag reflex ever now. I didn't have any specific food aversions or cravings other than not wanting heavy foods or dairy. No interest in meat like chicken or roast. Exhaustion like usual. Noticing hair growing a lot faster and have to shave my legs like every other day. My hair on my head is growing faster too and seems a little thicker.

Week 10: Baby is the size of a prune!

VERY tired this week. More than usual, and it hits me hard around 4-5 PM every day, to the point where if I don't take a nap, I'm ready to throw up and my body aches. Once I wake up though, I'm totally wrecked like I always used to be when I would nap prior to being pregnant. For awhile I could nap without any issues and wake up feeling great but not anymore. Clothes are getting tighter and it's not fun trying to find something to wear. I only want to wear baggy clothes or nothing at all. Apparently the placenta is forming and this is the most tired I've been since this pregnancy started. Poor Brian, because all I ever do is fall asleep when I get home and sleep until the next morning. He's started coming up, tucking me in since I've passed out sprawled across the bed, turning off the lights, and playing videos downstairs until it's actually a respectable time to sleep and then coming back up. No cravings whatsoever this week and no interest in eating at all. Haven't gained any weight.

Week 11: Baby is the size of a lime!

Week 11 was pretty brutal. My nausea came back in full force, stronger than it was weeks 7-8. I tried everything under the sun from raw ginger, in smoothies and on it's own, ginger chews, candied ginger, and finally broke down and had to take the prescription the doctor had given me at my week 8 appointment again. But, to no avail. I kept telling myself I could make it to my week 12 checkup, and I made it.... just barely. I threw up every single day of week 11. During this time I also had to suffer through some time at Girl's Camp. Normally I would have loved every second of it (which I sort of did), I just didn't love how I felt. I was bloated and nauseous and the heat only compounded everything. When I got home my ankles were swollen and I'm pretty sure I got a little dehydrated and I threw up all day the next day. Not a pleasant time in my pregnancy. Cravings this week consisted mostly of Watermelon slushies from Sonic.

Week 12: Baby is plum-sized! (Which my dad says still isn't golf ball sized yet)

I survived through the first part of the week and had my 12 week check up at 12 weeks & 5 days. They prescribed me a different prescription and so far it has helped me keep things down and reduce the nausea as much as possible so that I actually have an appetite. Cravings this week was pretty much limited to KFC mashed potatoes and gravy. Which is funny since the potatoes are instant and have zero nutritional value, but whatever, I kept them down. At least my cravings have been cheap things as opposed to filet mignon or something that would rob me blind, I left my week 12 appointment at the doctor's totally livid. A few weeks ago we decided to cancel our Bahamas cruise that was planned for the end of September due to the spread of the Zika virus that's hitting every country around the Bahamas currently. The plan was to fly to Orlando, go on our cruise, then head to Tampa for a few days after the cruise. Luckily we had only purchased our flights home from Tampa. After checking flights for awhile, we finally bought a flight to Tampa and began planning out how to spend our vacation in Florida instead. But when I went into my 12 week appointment and was asking about X-ray machines at the airport, my doctor informed me I should not be going to Florida due to the Zika outbreaks. I had only heard of it being in Miami but apparently it's slowly spreading all over the state. On top of the fact that Baby Baldwin was wriggling around so much that none of our ultrasound photos showed anything AT ALL but fuzziness, I left pissed off and an emotional mess, which I'm blaming on pregnancy. Not that I blame my unborn child and I definitely don't want to risk it, but I am so sick of stupid Zika, ruining all my babymoon plans. I still haven't cancelled the flights but I'm coming to terms with it and probably will in the next week or two. Hopefully we can put the money toward flights home for Christmas, since this year we're east coast bound.

And now we're in week 13 and apparently Baby Baldwin is peach sized, which is one of my favorite fruits so I like week 13. And this marks the last week of my first trimester which is SO crazy to think about. Can't believe I'm 1/3 of the way there! I think the best part of this milestone is finally being able to start telling people and make our big social media announcement, AND Brian will finally let me start buying things for the nursery! It's crazy to think at my next check-up I could find out if it's a boy or girl! I already have almost all the nursery furniture picked out, the theme, and a lot of baby products.. I'll probably start putting together a registry insanely early to make sure I don't forget anything I think I need and use it as a checklist as I start buying. Oh, here's more funniness. For anyone that knows me, you know I'm basically insanely OCD and I'm the biggest planner on the planet. I love planning parties, showers, etc. So, now I've got like everything for this unborn child planned out and it's been that way since week 6 because I can't help myself. Pregnancy has only made it worse, but oh well! 

So here's our big announcement, we're so excited!

Love,

The Baldwin's

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